Sorry to anyone who was looking for this post earlier today, due to our holiday I lost track of the days and forgot it was Sunday! Anyhow its time for another parenting gem and today I have a guest post from the wonderful Hublet. If you have never read any of his guest posts before you can find them here.
A Tale of Two Parents
(Goblin is very nearly 3)
We are often told that as parents you must work as a team providing a single message to your children to prevent confusion.
While this may be true, it does not alter the fact that you are different people with often disparate ideas on how to raise and entertain the kids.
This is particularly relevant in our situation as we don't have one parent working and one doing the bulk of the childcare as is often the case. As the Monko has said, we each have 2 days alone with Goblin, 2 days together with him and 1 day where he is in nursery.
It has become clear that we have very different experiences on our days alone with Goblin. With Monko there are play dates, art activities, music classes and nature trips.
I on the other hand being an antisocial, geek, tend to play with Lego, go for walks, cook, climb trees and build forts.
I like that Goblin gets to do different things and am also glad that I don't have to drag myself along to the invariably titled "mother" and child groups.
I can't tell if this is just teaching Goblin to continue my avoidance of social situations but then I remember the alternative would mean talking to people so quickly move on.
On our days together with Goblin we tread the middle ground. We don't go and see other people but do go out to the zoo or other family outings. It is also our chance to go to the shops for the traditional supermarket toddler tantrum.
In general though we have a pretty good split without arguments or stark disagreements on parenting decisions.
Our main areas of contention seem to be:
- Following the advice of parenting books
(Monko tends to read a book and for a short period will fanatically try and follow it, whereas my utter confidence in my own superior knowledge is only rivalled by my modesty)
(Monko is a lapsed Catholic who seems to have settled on the 'meh' camp, I am a militant atheist with a tendency to make inappropriate comments which offend people)
- Rainbow rice
Here is a graph to help illustrate my feelings:
Goblin seems to know this fact and insists on getting it out at every opportunity, particularly weekend mornings when I get up early so Monko can have a nap.
I am a sucker for his cute little face and dutifully get out the tarpaulin, diggers and tub of rice, only to watch him gleefully fling it about the room for me to tread on for the rest of the day.
Why does he torment me so?
Then, just as a tub of rainbow rice reaches the end of its life and I gleefully get to dump it in the bin, I see another batch of the vile stuff drying on the table!
I would happily spend the day treading on discarded Lego and plugs if it meant freedom from rainbow rice! Readers outside the UK will not have developed the cast iron feet required for living around British plugs which can in an emergency be used as caltrops.
I love my wife. I can put up with her blind belief in the random rantings of unqualified opinionated loons, or the parenting books, but the rainbow rice will have to stay on her side of the fence.
In summary, if you partner (or grandmother, neighbour, nanny etc) does things differently with your child then it can be quite a good thing. If only because it means you don't have to.
My top five posts from last week were
Reality bites ~ Two-daloo
Why your baby (or Toddler) should get messy eating ~ Your Kid's Table
Let Them "Do it by Myself"~ Like Mama, Like Daughter
The Truth about Toddlers - The Cutie and the Beauty
My Strong Willed Child ~ Triple T Mum
These were posts either contained a message I totally agreed with or where posts I totally related to. You guys can grab a featured button from my button page.
For your chance to be featured and to share your great parenting posts please link up this week - Here is the linky